Summary: Once, William Pratt was a quiet poet, madly in love with his wife, Drusilla. Now, Spike is a loner, hunting in the night for the monster who took her away. He is focused on vengeance, making no room for anything else in his life – until his plan to get his revenge takes a turn he never could have predicted.
Author's Notes: Parts of this fic get very dark. There’s angst, there’s violence,
there’s stuff that’s not altogether happy. It’s not all angst, but
there is a good bit, especially in certain parts. If at any point it
gets to be two much for you, you can do one of two things: stop
reading, hold your breath and hope it gets better, or email me and ask
me to answer any question you have about what’s coming up to see if
it’s something you still want to read. (I’ll always answer those
questions in private emails sent to addie_logan@yahoo.com. I will not
answer them in a public forum like my livejournal or a review page. I
don’t want to spoil the story for people who don’t want to know.)
However, what I ask you not to do is complain to me about things
being too dark or tell me it’s too much for you. I have some readers
who have problems with angst and some who don’t. I’m not going to
shortchange the ones who do, or myself for that matter, because some
people can’t take it. That’s not fair to anyone. So if you don’t like
what I’m writing, then that’s your personal preference, and you’re free
to read something else. I understand that, and I’m fine with it. I’m
not fine with flame wars, nor am I fine with people harassing me,
writing me threatening emails, or trash talking me around the internet.
(And just so you know, I’m not paranoid – this has happened.)
So, to sum up – there is angst. If you like it, that’s cool,
keep reading. If you don’t, that’s cool, too, you can quit reading. Or
read with one eye covered. Or something. Just don’t flame me.
Rating: NC-17
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Your world is coming to its end
But you don't have to be afraid - I'm here for you
Save your happiness for tomorrow
And today we'll drown in your tears
A drop of your blood tastes like wine today
Come closer my dear
It is just the beginning of the end
Yes, I'm here for you
Save your happiness for tomorrow
And today we'll drown in your tears
A drop of your blood tastes like wine today
And because I love you so
And I'm here for you
Save your happiness for tomorrow
And today we'll drown in your tears
A drop of your blood tastes like wine today
Save your happiness for tomorrow
And today we'll drown in your tears
Your blood tastes like life today
Will you let it rain
Let it rain
So won't you let it rain
Oh, let it rain
Won't you let it rain
— H.I.M., “Beginning of the End”
The room was covered in blood. Her blood. It was
everywhere, surrounding him, painting his vision in only red. She lay
on the couch, her throat torn, the eyes he’d loved so much empty and
lifeless. Still, he ran to her, taking her in his arms with a desperate
hope that it wasn’t too late. That he hadn’t failed her.
But as soon as he held her, she began to crumble, her body breaking
down until there was nothing but dust to slip through his fingers. A
cold laugh rumbled through the room, and he looked up, meeting dark,
dark eyes.
Spike sat up in bed, his bare chest covered in a sheen sweat, his body
glistening in the moonlight from the open window. He ran a shaky hand
through his platinum blond hair, wishing he could banish the images
that still plagued his dreams away from his mind forever. Yet he knew
nothing would push them away, not when they haunted his waking hours as
well. Every time he closed his eyes, he saw her face as it had been the
last time he’d seen it.
Cold, lifeless. Dead, open eyes staring, accusing…
Still trembling, Spike tossed off the covers and grabbed his jeans from
the floor, pulling them up as he went to the window, looking over the
London skyline. It had been ten years, and still he had yet to fulfill
the promise he’d made to the woman he loved. Ten lonely years of losing
himself to a mission he feared he’d never succeed in.
And in his search, he’d learned, discovering a world he’d once denied
the existence of. And while he’d become a formidable force, he hadn’t
been able to find the man – no, not a man – the monster he’d set out to destroy. The longer his search continued,
the more frustrated he became, and he fought to stave off the
helplessness that came with the fear of never being able to avenge the
woman he loved. The only woman he’d ever love…
There were times he wanted to give up, to let it all end. The more time
that passed, the less hopeful he got that he’d ever find justice for
her. However, he couldn’t bring himself to stop. Even if he never
succeeded, he owed it to her to keep trying – it was the least he could
do after he…
Spike shook his head, trying to push back the memories that would never go away.
He turned back to the bed, his tired body bringing him to eye it with
longing, though he knew trying to sleep again tonight would be futile.
After one of those dreams, it would be days before he could find sleep
anywhere but at the bottom of a bottle.
He scratched at the stubble on his face as he looked at the clock,
seeing it was only two in the morning. It was early enough still that
he could find some action if he wanted, and he decided he might as well
go back out and see what he could stir up. It was better than staying
home alone with his nightmares…
However, no sooner had he made his decision than did the tinny sound of
his mobile phone fill the small bedroom. His eyes flicked over to where
it lay on his bedside table, and he knew that if someone was calling at
this hour, it wasn’t for a mere social chat.
Not that he knew anyone who would call him simply to chat anyway.
Spike walked over to the table and picked up the phone, not recognizing
the number on the caller ID. He flipped it open and answered it with a
gruff, “Yeah?”
“Is this Spike? It’s Wesley Wyndam-Pryce. We met several weeks ago.”
Spike frowned as he tried to remember the man on the other line. “The
nest in Southwark,” he said as an image of the man popped into his mind
and he remembered meeting him when they’d both tracked down the same
hunting party. Afterwards, they’d gone for a pint, and Spike had drank
a little too much and divulged more of his life story than he’d meant
to in the process.
Still, that didn’t explain why the man would be calling him. Unless maybe he read a bit too much more into the night than Spike had intended…
“Yes, well, I just received a call from a contact of mine in Los
Angeles, California. It seems there’s a new master vampire trying to
lay claim to his area, and well, when Gunn said his name, it reminded
me of our conversation.”
“Yeah, how so?”
“He called the vampire Angelus.”
Spike stumbled back, his hand shaking again as the name echoed in his mind.
Angelus…
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