Summary: Spike is Buffy's swimming coach. He has been hateful to her since day one, a fact that hurts her because she is in love with him. Little does she know that his behaviour only serves to hide his own feelings. Tragic circumstances bring them closer together.
As it turned out, even swimming practice couldn’t ease the ache in her heart. Spike was nowhere to be seen. Instead another man was pacing up and down beside the pool.
“Is everyone here? Right. Better get started. My name’s Clem, I’m an old buddy of Sp…your coach. He’s come down with a little case of something, asked me to fill in for a couple of days. But he told me to tell you he’d still be here on Friday morning, ready to go to LA.”
A boy in the back piped up, “Is he okay? Not too sick?”
“Uh, I’m not exactly sure what his actual sickness is, just saw some of the symptoms.” Which of course had been Spike laying face down on the floor in his own drool, several bottles of Jack Daniels surrounding him. “So no need to worry, you’re coach will be just fine. Let’s start with…”
Buffy’s mind had already drifted away. Sure there was a chance he was really sick, but it was doubtful. Was he avoiding her? It really sucked that she had no way to get in contact with him.
She swam mechanically the whole afternoon without feeling any of the passion she had come to associate with her swimming, especially after she was with Spike. Buffy had looked forward to every afternoon where she’d try to swim harder and faster each day, just for Spike. She wanted to be the best she could for him. She was always rewarded with a kiss blown at her from the pool side or just a wink if there were others milling about. It hurt to find out just how lonely the pool seemed to be without him there.
Finishing up, an awful thought suddenly struck her. Spike wasn’t here, which meant she had no way to get to the hospital to see her mother. Any money she had left was at home. Spike obviously thought that Riley would be giving her lifts, but there was no way she was going to confuse his pea-sized brain with such a request. He would probably take that as a sign of her hitting on him.
So with a heavy heart she trudged home, which luckily was much closer to the pool than the hospital was. Her day had turned out to be fairly terrible and it was only made worse by the fact that the two people she loved most in the world were the same two that she wasn’t able to see right now. She picked up the phone and dialed the hospital.
“Mom? Hi, its Buffy.”
“Buffy sweetheart, why are you calling me? Is something wrong?”
“No, no. I’m just calling from the pool, Spike let me use the phone. Uh, you know how the swim meet is this Friday? Well, we have to stay here longer tonight for extra training. So I was just ringing to say sorry that I won’t be able to come tonight, and maybe not tomorrow night, but I’ll do everything I can to come in on Thursday ’cos we leave the next day.”
“Oh honey I really don’t mind. You make me so proud with your swimming, you know? I love imagining you powering up and down the pool, showing them how its done. I’m so glad you’ve got such a nice swim coach in Spike. He’s such a lovely man.”
“Yeah, uh…yeah. He’s lovely.”
“Well honey I better let you get off the phone and get out there! No rest for little champions like you!”
Buffy smiled through her tears and giggled. “Sure mom. Can’t wait to see you again.”
“Okay sweetie. Swim well, I love you.”
“Love you too mom.”
Buffy hung up, somehow feeling cheered up and yet more miserable at the same time. She knew she had enough money for one trip to and from the hospital, so if Spike wasn’t back at swimming by Thursday then she’d catch a cab there.
She walked into the kitchen and looked in the cupboard. It was still filled with food because Spike had had enough foresight to buy lots of things with a long shelf life. Staring at proof of just how much he’d done for her in a short time, Buffy realized she missed him terribly. She just wanted to see him again, apologize. If she hadn’t insinuated anything about Harmony then she would never have had to get a lift from Riley and Spike wouldn’t be thinking that she was cheating on him. God, it was just a big mess.
***
Thursday’s practice came and went. Spike still hadn’t shown up. So Buffy walked home, called a taxi and went to the hospital to visit her mother.
Joyce perked up as Buffy walked into the room. “Sweetie! Oh I’m so happy to see you! Spike let you off early, huh?”
“Uh yeah, yeah he did. He knew how important it was to me to see you before you left.”
“And he’s not here with you? He usually comes.”
“No, he couldn’t make it today.”
Joyce looked carefully at her daughter who seemed to be getting dark circles around her eyes. “Buffy, are you okay? You look so miserable.”
She looked up guiltily. “No mom, I’m fine. Just kinda nervous about the competition on Saturday, you know?”
Joyce shook her head. “Don’t lie to me Buffy. You’ve swum at lots of these things and you’re never like this. Tell me what’s happening. It worries me that I can’t be at home with you.”
Buffy sniffled quietly. “Mom, I really don’t wanna talk about it.”
“Is it Spike?” Joyce had her confirmation when Buffy’s head shot up quickly.
“Spike? What about Spike? Why would you say Spike?”
Joyce laughed. “Honey, calm down. I see how you look at him when the both of you are here. I know how you’ve felt about him for years. And to be honest, he looks at you in the same way.”
Buffy’s voice came out in a weak whisper. “I love him, mommy.”
“Oh, sweetie, what happened? Did he reject you?”
“Aren’t you against it? He’s my swim coach.”
“Baby, you’re nineteen years old. You’re an adult. And so is Spike. He’s not your teacher at school. It’s a completely different situation.”
“I know.” Buffy paused and took a deep breath. “He told me he loves me, and I told him too. But then, well, a few days ago this pretty girl joined our squad and I sort of accused him of cheating on me with her. He got angry so I got a lift home with Riley, and when Spike came to the house Riley was still there and…and it was all just a big mess.”
Joyce nodded. “Mmm hmm. So you haven’t worked it out?”
Buffy shook her head sadly. “He hasn’t been back to practice since. Another guy has been taking us. But he’s definitely going to be at the bus tomorrow. I just miss him so much.”
“Honey, I know it hurts right now. But I meant it when I said you’re both adults. You need to work it out like mature, responsible people. Talk to him, and listen to him. It’ll work out fine, I swear.”
“Thanks mom.”
“Well, its true what they say honey. Mothers always know best.”
***
It was late on Friday morning when Buffy approached the little bus that had all her team mates milling around it. Spike was there, lifting bags from the big pile into the back of the bus and laughing with Harmony. Buffy walked over and placed her bag down gingerly, cringing at Harmony’s loud voice.
“Aha! I know, God it was so funny! And then he just got out of the pool and did it again!”
Harmony saw Buffy standing next to the pile of luggage.
“Oh Buffy, hi! How excited are you! This is just so cool! We get all this afternoon and night off so we should totally go out on the town or something!”
Spike looked up when he heard Buffy’s name and their eyes met. She smiled tentatively at him, and he nodded his head but didn’t smile back. Buffy felt a little stab of pain shoot through her.
“Um, yeah Harmony. Sure. Sounds good.”
“Great! So, d’you wanna sit next to eachother on the bus?”
“Um, okay. If you want to.” Buffy followed Spike with her eyes as he gathered everyone together and herded them onto the bus. He hadn’t said a word to her yet and hadn’t even looked in her direction again.
Once everyone was seated, Spike stood up the front and yelled for attention.
“Right, everybody! Listen up. We’re arriving at our hotel this afternoon. Everyone is sharing a room with someone. You get this afternoon off, then we’ll all have dinner together at the hotel dining room, then if you wish you can go out. But curfew at midnight people, we’ve got a big day tomorrow.”
He looked up and down the rows, making sure people were listening.
“Okay, listen up for your room mates. Finn and Harris,” laughter from the bus, “Chase and Rosenburg,” wolf whistles, “Kendall and Summers…”
Buffy shot her eyes up. Was he serious? She was sharing a room with Harmony? What about the suite he said he’d booked for them? Now she wouldn’t be able to sleep in his room. He could have at least put her in a private room so no one would know if she wasn’t there. A painful thought hit her. Maybe he did it so she couldn’t see him? Maybe he didn’t want to be with her anymore?
Buffy slumped down in her seat, trying to stop the blinding tears from rolling down her face. Mature. Responsible. She was an adult. Her mom was right – she needed to talk to him and sort it out.