Summary: When Buffy falls through the portal in The Gift, she doesn't die. Instead, she turns up in Sunnydale—twenty years in the future. What happens when the one person she thought she'd never be happy to see is the one person who's stayed the same?
Rating: PG-13
"Buffy?"
Dawn's voice woke her, although it didn't sound quite like Dawn. For a moment, Buffy couldn't figure out why her sister sounded so strange, and then she came fully awake, the memories of the last few days bringing a sting she couldn't believe that time would assuage.
She didn't need more time, after all. Buffy needed to go back.
"Yeah?" she called, realizing that Dawn was still waiting for a response.
"Giles is on the phone. Do you want to talk to him?"
Buffy glanced at the clock, noting that it was late morning. She'd slept in quite a bit, although it had been late before she had gone to bed the previous night. Buffy had asked Spike what he did with his time, and he'd told her. He'd been hesitant at first, but then the words had begun to roll off of his tongue as he warmed to his subject.
Spike had always been a talker; Buffy remembered that.
It was odd, but it was easier to look at Spike than it was to look at anyone else. With the others, Buffy kept trying to see them as she remembered them; Spike hadn't changed at all.
"Sure," Buffy called, knowing that she was going to have to talk to Giles at some point. Her conversation with Willow had been stilted, to say the least. Willow kept saying how good it was to know that she was okay, but that was the only thing she'd said. Well, that and, "You're staying with Spike?" in such an incredulous tone of voice that Buffy had been suddenly and irrationally angry.
Just a few days ago, Buffy probably would have reacted the same way, but Spike had been the one to find her; she could find no fault in his actions, or in how he'd treated Dawn. So, maybe Willow could be excused for expressing surprise that Buffy would have consented to stay with him. Buffy still got the impression that Willow greatly disapproved.
Buffy decided that she didn't care; she just hoped that Giles wasn't going to read her the riot act too.
Dawn entered the room, handing her the phone with a sympathetic grimace. "He's on hold right now."
"How uncomfortable is this going to be?" Buffy asked.
Dawn shrugged. "Hard to say, really. Giles is still pretty cool, though."
Unable to put it off for any longer, Buffy took the phone. "Hello?"
"Buffy?" His tone was incredulous, as though Giles still couldn't believe she was alive. "How are you?"
"I'm good." It wasn't quite a lie. Under the circumstances, Buffy was doing pretty good.
Giles cleared his throat. "This is rather unexpected, you know."
"You're telling me," she responded wryly.
"I'm coming into town tomorrow evening," Giles stated. "Do you mind?"
"Mind?" Buffy repeated. "Giles, you're still my Watcher."
"Actually, I'm the head of the Council now," Giles admitted.
Buffy swallowed hard. "Oh."
Giles sighed. "The promotion came a few years ago. It was something of a surprise."
"Sure," Buffy said, feeling as though the rug had been pulled out from under her once again. "That's great. Congratulations." She tried to say it like she meant it.
She could hear the smile in his voice. "I can assure you that I have not become Travers."
"I didn't think you would," Buffy replied, affection coloring her tone. Even though Giles had been the one to suggest that she might have to kill Dawn in order to save the world, that seemed a distant concern now. After all, Dawn was alive and well, and so was Buffy.
"I'll see you tomorrow," Giles said. "Tell Spike that we'll discuss matters then."
Buffy had no idea what he was talking about, but she decided to let it go. "Yeah, okay."
"I'm so glad you're back, Buffy," Giles said warmly.
"Me, too." Buffy hung up and looked at Dawn. "This is going to be interesting."
Dawn shrugged. "He hasn't changed that much, Buffy. Well, he'll actually use a computer these days, but otherwise Giles is the same."
Buffy smiled, but she wasn't so sure, with the way everything else had changed.
~~~~~
Spike was beginning to feel more than a little crowded. He'd been living alone for nearly a decade, and now Buffy and Dawn were staying with him, and Giles was on his way into town—although the Watcher was at least planning on staying at a hotel. In a few weeks, he had even more people to look forward to, particularly with Xander and Anya planning on coming to Dawn's place with their kids.
Buffy and Dawn had spent the day shopping with Tara for things that Buffy needed while he'd slept. Spike had slipped Dawn his credit card, not wanting Buffy to know who was funding their expedition in case she took offense. They'd been back for several hours, though, and seemed to take up all the space he had with Dawn's tales of his own embarrassing moments, and a few of her children's. He'd needed a break from their chatter, used as he was to silence.
He flicked his lighter, taking a deep drag on his cigarette as the flame caught. Technically, you weren't supposed to smoke anywhere in California, but the last time someone had tried to stop him, Spike had flashed a little fang. That had stopped the protests pretty quickly.
"What are you doing out here?"
Spike turned to see Buffy framed in the doorway. "Havin' a smoke. You?"
"I couldn't sleep." She leaned up against the building next to him. "Giles is coming tomorrow, huh?"
"Looks like."
"Is there anything I should know?"
Spike gave her a sharp look, covering his confusion with another drag. "Dunno. What do you mean by that?"
"You don't get along with Willow and Xander," Buffy pointed out. "Dawn is polite to Willow, but no more than that. She and Xander get along okay, but they mostly just talk about their kids. I was just wondering if there was anything I should know about Giles."
Spike shrugged. "Not really. He still talks to everybody, far as I know. We're not friends, but we're cordial."
"What about Giles and Willow?" Buffy asked.
Spike snorted. "They made up a long time ago. Pretty much everybody put the past behind them at Dawn's wedding. It worked out."
"Except for you," Buffy observed.
Spike's smile was tight. "They didn't think it was important."
"Will you patrol with me?" Buffy asked, out of the blue.
Spike wasn't quite sure where that had come from, but he wasn't going to question it; Buffy seemed to be seeking him out. "Sure, Slayer. Anytime."
"Now?" Buffy said. "I feel..."
When she trailed off, Spike nodded. "Let me get weapons, an' we can head out, yeah?"
He dashed upstairs, his cigarette dangling out of his mouth. The apartment was quiet, and Spike assumed that Dawn had gone to bed. Tyler was more of a morning person, and over the years Dawn had switched to an entirely diurnal schedule. She joked that old age and motherhood were catching up to her.
The frightening part—the part that wasn't funny—was that Spike was well aware that Dawn was aging. Year after year, he could see the changes in her body, in the lines around her eyes and mouth. In time, she would go where he couldn't follow.
This was the part about being a vampire that Spike hated; the part that caused him to wish he'd never gotten mixed up with humans. Sometimes he wondered if he shouldn't have taken off after Buffy died, forgotten all about his promise. In many ways it would have been easier.
Spike wouldn't give up what he had for the world, however, no matter what kind of pain it caused him.
When he emerged from his building, Buffy was waiting patiently for him, taking the stake he offered without a word. They set off at a slow walk; neither of them was in a hurry, Spike in particular.
He didn't mind Dawn's presence so much, but having the others around was going to change things.
"Where are the best places to find vampires these days?" Buffy asked.
Spike shrugged. "The usual places. That much hasn't changed."
"You don't have a Slayer here," Buffy noted. "Have you guys had an apocalypse since Glory?"
"Not really," he said, trying to recall. "Little ones, maybe."
She gave him a wry smile. "How can an apocalypse be little?"
"They were all that way after you were gone," Spike commented. "Wasn't much to lose after that."
"What do you—oh." She fell silent. "I don't want to do this," Buffy admitted.
"Don't want to do what, pet?" he inquired.
"This thing at Dawn's." Buffy sighed. "It's going to be really awkward and uncomfortable, and they're probably going to pressure me to make a decision about what I want to do now. Xander was already asking where I was going to be staying when I talked to him earlier. I don't know any of that."
"'Course you don't," Spike said easily. "You just got back, didn't you?"
"They're going to want to know." Buffy looked up at the sky. "You did a really great job, you know."
"With what?" he asked.
"Dawn. She's great."
"She came that way," Spike said dismissively.
"I still think you might have had a little something to do with it," Buffy replied.
Spike decided that it wasn't in his best interests to argue with her. "You've always got a place here, Buffy. They get to be too much, you can come to me."
"I know." Buffy smiled. "I may be taking you up on that offer."
They patrolled in silence after that, their shoulders brushing on occasion. Spike couldn't quite believe it.
~~~~~
Spike didn't go to the airport with Buffy and Dawn, although she'd asked him to. Buffy had really enjoyed the time spent patrolling with him. When the conversation faltered—when Buffy had run out of things to say—Spike seemed to sense her desire to be quiet, and yet not to be alone with her thoughts. He'd told her stories, embarrassing stories about Dawn that her sister would never have told her, about demons he'd killed, about places he'd been.
Spike talked, and where once Buffy would have hated listening to him, now she couldn't get enough of his voice. The familiar baritone was a welcome distraction from the thoughts inside her own head. Strange, that it would be so easy to be with the vampire, when she'd hated him so much before.
Even though it had been twenty years for Spike, to Buffy it felt like yesterday, although the last few days had been unbelievably long.
Buffy recognized Giles immediately. His hair was completely gray now, and his face was more lined, but he was still undeniably Giles.
She knew when he saw her, because he stopped in his tracks, staring at her as though he couldn't quite believe his eyes. Buffy took a step forward, although no more than that; security wouldn't let her get closer.
That seemed to have been the nudge Giles needed to get moving, because he took a firmer grip on his bag and began striding forward, his gait as strong and even as it had been the last time Buffy had seen him.
"Buffy." Giles didn't even pause. His arms came around her in a grip that might have been crushing had she not been the Slayer. Buffy returned the embrace, clutching at his jacket and burying her face in his shoulder. "Let me look at you," he said, pulling back to look her up and down. "You look amazing."
"I haven't aged a day, huh?" Buffy smiled. "I've been getting that a lot."
Giles frowned. "Perhaps a day or two, but no more than that, certainly." He touched her shoulder gently in a fatherly gesture that warmed Buffy to the core, then turned to her sister. "Hello, Dawn." Their greeting was equally affectionate. "How have you been?"
"Good," Dawn replied, then added, "Really good right now."
He smiled. "How are the children?"
"Growing faster than I can keep up with," Dawn replied, taking his bag.
Buffy had been about to offer, but instead she took the arm Giles offered her. She wasn't quite sure what to say, mostly because Giles pretty much knew everything, while Buffy had twenty years worth of news to catch up on.
"I have some paperwork for you," Giles said quietly. "You have the full support of the Council at your disposal in getting settled."
Buffy blinked. "What does that mean exactly?"
"It means that you needn't worry about money for the time being," he said, giving her hand a squeeze. "We know that it will take you time to get settled, Buffy."
She felt a wave of relief. "Thank you, Giles."
"It's the least we can do," he replied sincerely. "You sacrificed yourself; there ought to be some reward for that."
Buffy couldn't disagree with him there. "You'd think so."
"I'd like to see Spike tonight," Giles stated. "There are certain things that we need to discuss."
Buffy caught Dawn's frown but couldn't interpret the meaning behind it. "Giles, you aren't—"
The Watcher shook his head. "It's nothing to do with that."
She was getting tired of people talking about things like that—with vague references that she couldn't understand. It felt as though they were deliberately shutting her out. "Nothing to do with what?"
Giles winced. "Nothing to do with you, to be precise. Willow has already called me."
Buffy frowned. "Called you about what?"
"You staying with Spike."
She raised an eyebrow. "Where else was I supposed to stay?"
"It's more for the future than the present," Giles explained. "She's concerned that Spike will see this as an opportunity to exploit your vulnerability."
Buffy snorted. "I am not vulnerable. If Spike tries anything I don't want him to, he'll get a punch in the nose."
Of course, she didn't mention that she wouldn't mind terribly much if Spike did try something. And where had that thought come from?
"Which is what I told her," Giles said smoothly. "Willow hasn't been around a Slayer for a long time; I'm sure she's just forgotten how capable you are." Changing the subject, he asked Dawn, "Will Spike be joining us for Christmas this year?"
Dawn shrugged. "With Willow and Xander coming, I think he'll probably make an appearance, but I don't think he'll stay long."
Giles nodded, not saying anything more. Buffy tried to relax back into the comforting presence of her sister and Watcher, but things felt off now. As the moments passed, and Buffy watched Giles and Dawn together, it became even clearer how much she'd missed, years that could never be replaced.
It felt wrong, and the initial familiarity that Giles had represented faded, leaving Buffy feeling even more like a stranger in her own life.
~~~~~
Spike looked over Buffy's shoulder as they stood in his living room, impressed with the fake documents that Giles had managed to have made. No one would ever guess that they weren't the real thing, particularly with the signs of age that had been added. Nearly everything was the same, save for the year of birth.
"I thought you could tell people that you and Dawn are cousins," Giles suggested. "It would account for the differences in your ages, and the lack of contact for the last twenty years, while allowing you both to claim the familial connection."
"That's a great idea, Giles," Dawn said, obviously pleased. "Tyler and I haven't told anyone yet, but we're going to have to give out some story."
Buffy nodded, although she didn't appear to be quite as satisfied with the proposed solution as Dawn was. "That works."
"Is everything alright?" Giles asked.
"I'm fine." Spike could hear the tension in her clipped tone. "I wish people would stop asking me that."
"Of course," Giles replied, sounding a bit hurt.
Buffy's face softened. "These are great, Giles. It's just—nothing. This is perfect, a lot better than what I could have come up with." She looked over at Spike. "Do you want to go out on patrol?"
Spike shrugged. "Sure." He watched as she left the room to get her jacket, leaving Giles and Dawn a little startled at her abrupt departure. "We'll talk when I get back?" Spike suggested.
Giles nodded. "Of course, although it might be best to meet you elsewhere. You know where I'm staying?"
"You don't mind waiting up?"
Giles shook his head. "I caught a few hours of sleep on the plane. I'll be fine."
Spike turned to face Buffy as she came out of the bedroom that he'd mentally designated as hers. In his mind, that room had always been Dawn's, but in a few short days, Spike had reassigned it; now it would always be Buffy's.
"Ready?" she asked.
"Whenever you are."
"Don't wait up," Buffy said cheerfully, making a beeline for the door.
Spike knew exactly what the Slayer was doing, and he had no doubt that Giles and Dawn did, too. All of them remembered how Buffy had tended to use avoidance as a defense mechanism when upset or uncomfortable. At Dawn's raised eyebrows, he shrugged, following Buffy out the door.
They walked in silence for a while, Spike leading the way. He'd done some investigating to find out where all the vampire activity was these days, knowing that Buffy needed action.
"Sunnydale doesn't have the demon activity that it used to," Buffy observed after staking her second vampire.
Spike raised an eyebrow. "I don't know. Seems to be busy enough to me. I still get my spot of violence in before bedtime."
"It just seems quieter," she observed. Buffy frowned. "It's you, isn't it?"
"What?" Spike asked, feeling a pang of alarm. He wasn't sure what she was accusing him of, but he was pretty sure that he hadn't anything to do with it.
"Keeping the demon population down," Buffy clarified. "You've been hunting."
The way she said it, anyone would have thought that the Slayer was accusing him of something truly heinous. "No, 'course not," Spike said quickly. "A bit here an' there, but nothin' more than that."
Buffy shook her head. "You said that there were little apocalypses. No one is in town except for you and Tara, so you have to be involved somehow."
Spike sighed. "Yeah, so what? When Dawn was younger, it was for her. Didn't want her getting hurt because the Slayer wasn't around to keep the vampire population down. Just got to be a habit after that."
Buffy didn't look like she believed him. "What is up with you?" she demanded.
"I could ask the same thing," Spike shot back. "You're actin' like I've committed some crime, when all I've been doin' is keepin' my promise."
"You shouldn't be keeping your promise!"
"Why not?" he challenged.
"Because you're a vampire!" Buffy's voice indicated that she was near tears, and Spike had no idea what was going on. They hadn't fought since he'd first seen her a few days before—which was a record for them.
And maybe that was it right there, Spike realized. Buffy was picking a fight with him, wanting the familiarity.
Spike was willing to oblige her; it was just like old times, and he had to admit that it felt damn good. No one fought with him like Buffy.
"You don't have a soddin' clue about vampires, pet," he shot back, his tone intentionally snide. "You've been out of the game too long."
She flew at him, her punches and kicks wild and uncontrolled. If Spike hadn't already realized what was going on, he'd have known then. Buffy had never been this out of control during a fight that he could remember; if she had, there would be no way she could have possibly have survived as long as she had.
Spike fended off her punches but did little more than that, although he could have hit back. While he hadn't mentioned the fact to the Slayer, the chip had long since stopped working.
When he sensed that she was growing tired, Spike caught her wrists, holding her still until she'd stopped fighting him, instead standing with her chest heaving with unshed tears.
He said nothing, instead watching her as she brought herself under control. "Sorry," she muttered.
"Don't be," he replied. "You didn't hurt me."
Buffy shook her head, obviously still fighting back tears. "I thought it was going to be easier with Giles here. I thought he would tell me what I should do."
"Maybe he doesn't know either," Spike suggested. "Maybe he doesn't want to rush you, let you make your own decision. He hasn't been here all that long, Buffy."
Buffy shook her head impatiently. "I know. I knew that before. It's just..."
"Come on," Spike said, putting a tentative hand on her shoulder. "I know where there's a big nest. Might as well clear it out, since we've got the time."
"Okay." Instead of pulling away from him, Buffy shifted closer. "You never did finish that story about Dawn's senior prom," she prompted.
Spike smiled a little evilly. When Dawn found out he'd told this story, she'd probably try to kill him; he decided that he didn't care, not when it would put a smile on Buffy's face. "Told Dawn she wasn't going unless I met the kid first," he began. "And I wanted to make sure he treated her right, yeah?"
Sure enough, Spike saw the smile tugging at her lips. "What did you do?"
He grinned broadly. "Is it my fault that the kid didn't have any balls?"
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