Chapter 33: Visting, Part One
Author's Notes: Part one of a two part chapter. It wouldn't completely post at some sites as a whole so it's in parts. Sorry.
Saturday Morning *Shoes .... shoes .... Ah! ..... okay, last check in mirror ..... Damn! That stupid curl keeps popping up and ruining the whole thing! ..... There! Stay! ...... Good ..... Good ... Watch ..... rings..... necklace .... keys ....*
*knock* *knock* After giving herself one last glance in the mirror, Buffy ran to open her bedroom door. John stood there shyly, his hands in his pockets and his head slightly bowed as he looked at her. Buffy thought that was her favorite look on him -- kinda little boy bashful, all nervous about coming to her room.
*Aw.*
"Good morning!" She thought she'd start off chipper, try to put him at ease a little bit.
"'Mornin'."
He stood there awkwardly, gazing at the results of Buffy's 'visitation' look that she'd been working on for the last hour or so. She wore comfortable blue jeans, a black turtleneck sweater, comfortable black leather loafers, a silver cross on a chain, and a silver ring or two on each hand. Her long blonde hair was pulled back into a long ponytail, with wisps of hair framing her face. No makeup but some soft eyeshadow and a natural lip gloss this morning. She looked both stunning and absolutely natural and wholesome. He thought she looked like she should be in a milk commercial. A teenage dream girl.
*Damn.* John chastised himself. He had to stop thinking like that.
He shuffled slightly, and Buffy remembered her manners and invited him in. That felt strange, it actually being his house and all, but then it was the bedroom of a teenage girl, so she guessed he was all nervous on that account. Again, she thought he was very cute today.
He almost sat on her bed, then realized what it was and straightened up like he'd been burned, and moved to the center of the room instead.
"You look great today, Buffy," he started. "You ready for your first visitation?"
"Thanks. And I'm
so nervous actually. I haven't seen Katie for a week, but it feels like months so much has happened. I hope she's okay. She'll be okay, won't she? I'm so worried. What if she's not okay, but I have to give her back, you know? How do I do that? She belongs with me..." Buffy stopped when she realized she was about to cry, and she did not want to go there right now.
John was a little overwhelmed by this rapid-fire sharing of her fears, and he had no idea what to say to the poor girl. Last night she shut down completely when he mentioned the visitation, but this morning she was starting to break down. He was completely unprepared for this development and had no idea what to do with a nervous teenage girl.
"Um...I'm sure Tanya will be able to help you through this today. Your fears are probably the same as other young mothers in your situation, and she probably knows exactly how you should handle the visitation and can put your concerns to rest."
*That was the best advice I can come up with? Tell someone else who has a clue?* He gave himself a mental kick. He was such an idiot.
"Thanks. You're right. I just need to stay positive and tell Tanya what I'm feeling. I didn't mean to dump on you first thing." Buffy backpedaled quickly once she realized that John looked like he was in the deep end of the pool with only water wings to keep him afloat. She didn't want the poor man to drown in her problems at eight o'clock on a Saturday morning. He was so supportive and kind to her, she shouldn't take advantage and freak him out with the depth of her fears and needs. She needed to work these things out on her own. He provided a home, not therapy.
"Well, anyway," John decided to get to the point and change the subject. "It's Christmas next Saturday, and I know we haven't really worked out your allowance situation yet, with Rosemary having had such a bad week we really haven't had a chance to discuss it yet. But for now, let's just say for December, we're going to give you $150 to get any gifts you wish to buy and another $50.00 for any incidentals you might need."
Buffy was shocked. That was a lot of money, and she was sure foster care didn't pay that well. On the other hand, they clearly had money of their own and John was offering her something she could really use. It wasn't her fault that her carefully saved money got confiscated last week, or that her presents for Katie were destroyed in the overzealous search of her apartment. She decided that as a one-time 'gift' she couldn't afford not to take his offer of the Christmas money.
"That's so kind of you, and I know you don't have to give me that much money." John started to protest but Buffy held up a hand and stopped him. "No, really. I'm going to accept it, since you've been so kind to offer. I saved my own money for presents and stuff, and even had some Christmas presents for Katie already wrapped and under the tree, but the police tore the presents apart looking for drugs, and confiscated my savings as 'drug proceeds' so I have nothing right now. If it were just me I wouldn't mind so much, but I really want to give Katie some presents, and you and Rosemary and Tanya and Willow -- and I don't have any way to do it. So, thank you. I really mean it, you've been so wonderful to me this week and I'll never forget it."
Buffy walked over and hugged him carefully -- she didn't want to overwhelm him any more than he already seemed to be -- and then stepped back and took the money he held out for her.
"Thank you."
"That's quite alright. We have so much, this is really not a problem at all for us, Buffy. We want you to be happy here and we want you to have the things you need. I'm glad I could help you this way. Really." He nodded and smiled, and backed toward the door to make his exit.
Buffy smiled at his sly exit strategy. He
was very cute, all uncomfortable and all.
She said thanks again and shut her door. Counting the money out to see if it was as he said, she happily put it in her front pocket and checked the mirror one more time to make sure she was perfect for today's big visit. She wanted everything today to be perfect.
~~~~~~~~
The Social Services Satellite Office and Visitation Center was located in Carlton, about thirty minutes up the coast from Sunnydale. That Saturday morning Tanya and Buffy settled into a booth at a restaurant located at about the half-way mark between the two towns and prepared to eat breakfast and discuss Buffy's case plan.
On the drive to the restaurant, Buffy had answered all of Tanya's questions about how she was settling into her own foster placement with enthusiastically positive declarations that Tanya decided needed a careful watch. No one was that happy the first week in foster care, and immediately after being forcefully separated from their child. She felt that Buffy was clearly living in denial and not really dealing with her situation head on, but she'd let her do that for a little while, and see if she didn't come out of it in her own time. The girl had been through a lot this past week, and if her psyche needed some time-out, she'd let her be for now. They also discussed how the visitation would go today, and she answered all Buffy's questions on that score.
"Okay, now. First thing we need to do is get your reunification plan signed and out of the way here." Tanya poured herself some coffee and started up with the little creamers and sugars while Buffy watched silently from her side of the table. "What the law says, is that you have to be separated from Katie for a time, the 120 days Judge Holtz gave us, and during that time we will pursue what is called a 'reunification plan'. Reunification means that we are going to try to get you and Katie back together again, or 'reunified'. With me so far?"
Buffy nodded and stared at her own coffee, stirring it needlessly to give her hands something to do.
"Right then. Well here's the terms of your plan, all written out on this form here for you to sign once I've explained them to you. This is the plan Judge Holtz ordered for you as part of your probation, and is also the plan for getting Katie back from a separate foster care placement. The details the judge left up to social services and probation department determination. Then in 120 days we all go back to court to tell Judge Holtz how you've done with the plan and he decides what happens next. It could be getting Katie back to you or another 120 days of separate foster care. So cooperating with your plan is very important, Buffy. You won't get that baby back if you slip in your plan." She paused to see how Buffy was handling this so far, but Buffy never said a word, just watched her and waited for her to continue.
*Damn, the girl is quiet all of a sudden.*
"Now, usually the probation department handles kids who are on probation, but because of the way this county is organized and due to the fact that you're in foster care for reasons not entirely of your making - and there's also Katie's dependency status as well - I've been assigned to handle your case without involving anyone else from probation. So there's just me you deal with here, okay? Katie has her own worker - you remember Pat - and you have me. So if you have any questions or concerns I'm the person you need to call. Okay?"
Buffy nodded and smiled, but still didn't speak.
"Uh-huh. Okay then. Let's get right into your plan. These are the things you have to do between now and when we go back to court in April. These have to be completed as much as it is possible to do them. The first thing is that you are to obey all orders of the court. That's important. If the Judge said do it, then you'd better do it. You understand this, now?"
"Yes."
"Alright, then. The rest of your plan is numbered here, and I'm going to read them to you and you ask if you have any questions, okay?"
"Okay."
"Good. The plan says:
1. Maintain contact through scheduled visitation. That means you attend every scheduled visitation with Katie. If you miss any, it will count against you when the judge is trying to decide whether you should get her back or not. So you make those visits no matter what.
2. Complete series of Parenting classes. These are the classes, all for parents of children 12 months to 18 months old. There's
Basic Parenting Skills, Discipline, Physical and Psychological Health, and Educational Head Start. Each class is taught at the center in Carlton that we are going to today. I know it's thirty minutes away but there is a good bus line that goes there and back so even if you don't have a ride it shouldn't be too difficult to get to the classes and you absolutely must attend these classes. Each one is three sessions long. You shouldn't have any problem completing them all by April. We can sign you up for them today, so you'll have the sessions all ready to go when they start in January. All right?"
Buffy nodded again and smiled her assurance that she would do what Tanya was telling her. She hated this. All these classes to teach her things she'd been doing for a year already on her own. She didn't really think they could teach her anything she didn't already know and do. Fred had been a good role model, and she had that book Fred gave her. She thought she and Katie were doing fine without any special classes, and she resented this. But she was ordered to cooperate and cooperate she would.
"Next, is that you must attend high school, with good attendance, and satisfactory grades. Your principal will be preparing a report for the judge to read at the next hearing, so you want to be sure that report is positive and doesn't have any disciplinary actions in it, no excessive absences or tardiness, poor grades, that sort of thing. This is important. It's part of your probation."
"Okay, I understand."
"Next is that you will maintain a cooperative home life with your foster parents. They will be speaking to me when the time comes and I will have to prepare a report on how you are doing in placement, and so you don't want there to be any disciplinary problems at home, no fighting, no defiance, that sort of thing. They may not be your real parents, but as your foster parents you need to show them the respect you would be expected to give your natural parents. Okay?"
"Okay, not a problem."
"Good. The next condition is to attend counseling regarding your assault. I have made an appointment for you with a very good therapist I personally know who works with the DCFS on occasion, and you are to go see her next Tuesday at 1pm. She is in Sunnydale there near you too, so you shouldn't have much trouble getting to that appointment. Her name is Olivia Williams, and I do think you'll like her, Buffy. She does a lot of rape counseling as well as handle teenagers in the system such as yourself, and is a very kind and warm person. But if for some reason you two don't click like I think you will, please let me know and we can always find you a different counselor. It's important that you're comfortable with your therapist, Buffy. So you let me know, okay?"
"Okay." Buffy really hated this part. She felt she had no reason to talk to anybody about this and really resented being forced to open up to complete strangers about something so personal that she was sure she was dealing with just fine on her own. But she had no choice in the matter, so she sucked it up and agreed to cooperate.
"Olivia will be preparing a report for the judge also, but will not divulge any details that you talk about. Now, the other three conditions are add ons that are automatic when a teenage girl gets pulled into the system as you have been, and I know you may not feel these are necessary but they are required so you're gonna have to just buck up and do it,okay?"
Buffy frowned and decided not to nod until she heard what these three new things were about.
"The first is you will need to attend a one-time class on domestic violence for teenage girls and young women."
Buffy groaned.
"The second is that you must attend a one-time class on Sexuality and Pregnancy Prevention for teenage girls."
Buffy glared across the table at Tanya.
"And the third is that you must attend a six week program on substance abuse."
Buffy sat up straight and let her jaw drop.
*Well, at least there's some reaction this morning.* Tanya waited for the outburst that she knew was coming.
"Substance abuse?! I have no
substance abuse problem. Why do I have to do that?!" Buffy was truly shocked and outraged at the injustice of this.
"Because you're sixteen and the county has decided that they're gonna take this opportunity, while you are a captive audience here, to make sure you get some training on substance abuse and domestic violence and pregnancy prevention. It has nothing to do with you personally, honey, it's just a requirement they threw in there for every teenager in your position. Just cooperate, attend the group sessions, and get through it. And also," Tanya added as an afterthought. "be sure you don't actually indulge in any contraband substances while you're in the program, because they will drug test you each week."
"Drug test me?" Buffy's demeanor had quieted from loud objection to calm outrage. "Drug test
me?"
"I understand, but there it is. Can't be helped. So just cooperate and be aware, is all I'm saying. I know that has not been a problem with you, but it's part of your probation so you're just gonna have to do it. Try to relax and just go along and get along here, sweetheart. Nothing good can come from fighting your probation plan. You'll just end up in a group home, without Katie. You don't want that to happen do you?"
Buffy was furious but pulled up and slumped back into her seat. No, she didn't want that. She reminded herself that she was doing all this for Katie and that once she had her back and was off probation these people would leave them alone and they could live their lives without interference again. She just had to put up with all this crap for a while, but the end result was Katie came home. She just had to focus on that.
"Okay, I get it. Cooperate." Buffy tried to hide the anger she felt, but wasn't quite successful. Tanya decided to let it go for now. Buffy needed to work through this in her own time, and get used to her new life and it's obligations. No need to push her today. Today was already stressful enough for her.
"I will be visiting you once a month, to see how it's going and you can tell me then if you have questions or problems. If something is urgent call me sooner and let me know, but there shouldn't really be any problems as far as I can tell. At the end of this review period we'll all go back to court, and if Judge Holtz is satisfied by your progress he might let you and Katie be in foster care together. But even if he says it's okay, we would still need to find a place for you together and that might not happen immediately. But we would be working hard to get that set up for you so please keep this in mind. Okay? There's a goal we're trying to reach here, and you should try not to get caught up in the anger over having to follow your plan and keep your eye instead on the goal. Which is getting Katie back with you. If we can reach that goal the rest of this will seem like nothing in comparison. Just try to remember that, okay?"
Buffy stared out the window and tried to take all of these orders in, and to do what Tanya suggested. Keep her eye on the goal and don't stress out over the plan no matter how stupid it seems right now. Just keep your eyes on Katie.
"Yeah. It's for Katie. I can do this for her." Buffy asserted gravely. "But I don't have to like it."
Tanya smiled at the child-like statement Buffy tacked on to her agreement.
*She is just a child herself. Poor baby.*
"No, you don't have to like it. But you do have to be cooperative and try not to make it obvious that you think the whole thing is stupid, or you might wind up with a less than positive report to Judge Holtz and you don't want to have all your work to go for nothing by a negative report to the judge. Okay?"
"I understand. Be positive." Buffy thought for a moment. "I feel like I'm in hell.... but it's a
dry heat." She smiled sarcastically.
Tanya laughed. "Yes, it's a dry heat." She chuckled. "Dry heat ... you're a trip, you know that?"
Buffy pouted. "I believe it's been mentioned once or twice."
The waitress came by and took their order, and they spent the rest of the meal talking about anything else but probation plans and visitation schedules.
In the end, it was a good breakfast.